Anal Sex or Vaginal Sex?

vaginal or anal sex Sultry Secrets - Anal Sex or Vaginal Sex?

We’ve come a really long way when it comes to our sexual expression. Regardless of our gender, sexuality or preferences, we have been able to explore all kinds of brand new and extremely fun ways to get our kinky kicks on. But as liberated as we may feel, there are some taboos that we still may need to break.

The hot topic in conversation? Anal sex.

There’s more talk of it in favored culture, self-help sites and advice columns than before, and getting rid of taboos mean people are less apprehensive to ask for advice when it comes to anal sex.

Here at Sultry Secrets, we couldn’t be happier. Along with these changes comes the added benefit of discussing consent, well being and pleasure when it comes to our sex lives, and specifically anal sex. Plus, we know how much fun it can be for many different people, so we love that it’s being explored more and more.

So, if you’re curious, apprehensive or just want to know a little bit more, we’ve compared anal and vaginal sex and discussed why certain people might prefer one over the other while busting some myths around the downsides of anal.


So, we are big fans of both anal and vaginal, and so are many different people. However, there are lots of people who prefer one over the other, for a variety of different reasons:


Many women have problems with pain when it comes to penetrative vaginal sex. Anal sex combined with clit stimulation is a great alternative.

Lots of people like the fact that both partners can give and receive anal sex with the help of sex toys.

Some people find that anal sex offers them more intense, all-over orgasms compared to vaginal sex.


For some people, vaginal sex takes much less preparation than anal sex.

As there needs to patience and trust involved in anal sex, many people prefer vaginal if they are in the early stages of a sexual relationship or having no-strings-attached sex.

Anal sex just isn’t for some people – they think the sensation feels strange, or can’t relax enough to enjoy it.

Whatever you prefer is absolutely fine, but we’d always recommend using lube, so can enjoy every sensation that little bit more.


Sometimes, people can be curious about anal sex but have certain hang-ups because of rumours they’ve heard or stories they’ve been told. Which is totally normal! It’s fine to feel a bit nervous about something you’ve never done before. We’re here to be totally honest with you about anal sex, and we bet some of the things you’ve been told are simply not true (or at least a bit exaggerated!).

MYTH ONE – It’s going to really hurt

This is probably the most common myth we hear, but in reality, anal sex doesn’t have to hurt at all. Any pain is mostly due to lack of preparation — so being properly prepared is key.

Many people find anal sex incredibly pleasurable when it’s done correctly. Start slow, give each other lots of time to get used to the new sensations and try to relax. Some people find that using small anal sex toys is a great way to introduce the new feelings and relax both partners. Many women also love the feeling of having their clit stimulated during anal, which helps take their orgasms to the next level.

MYTH TWO – it can cause long-lasting damage

Having any kind of sex the wrong way can cause damage. However, the vagina can create its own lubrication but the anus can’t, so it’s essential that lots and lots of lube is used for a healthy and pleasurable anal experience.

MYTH THREE – regular anal sex will stretch you out

This is a massive misconcepti on. As you begin to practice anal sex regularly, you may feel like you’re more relaxed down there, but this is due to you becoming less nervous and relaxing mentally before the act. Just like the vagina, when introduced properly, the anus can accommodate sex toys or penis’s of all different shapes and sizes – again, it’s all about being comfortable and using lots of lube.

MYTH FOUR – it’s going to get messy

 It’s never as messy as you think it’s going to be, and it’s incredibly rare to have any kind of “accident” during anal sex. One of the most important things to remember is that you should never move from anal straight into vaginal sex, as even microscopic fecal elements can cause vaginal infections. Make sure you wash everything with mild soap and use a fresh condom if you plan on re-entry during your session.

So there you have it. When it comes to anal vs vaginal sex, it’s all about personal preference. A healthy mix of both is a great way to bring something new to your sex life, but preferring one over the other is fine as well.